Healing is hard work. There really is no way to anticipate hiccups along the way or fast-track successes. If healing were a linear thing - something that happens in specific steps and order - it would be so much easier.
But it isn't, it doesn't and it's just plain hard work.
My favorite illustration for healing, whether it's physical, emotional or mental, is your most commonly traveled route to anywhere.
Think of the route you drive every day or multiple times a week. You know it so well your car could drive it for you, right?
Now think of all the other vehicles and drivers on that road over the course of a day. That could be hundreds or thousands of people! And you're all driving the same route.
But is your experience driving that stretch of road the same as someone else's? Are you driving the exact same car with the same tires and music on the radio? Are you traveling at exactly the same speed and hitting all of the lights the same? What about the weather while you're driving? Maybe you just filled your gas tank and the next person is running on fumes.
Can you see it? Even though you're driving the same road and you may see the same signs and restaurants and trees along the way, there is an infinitesimal possibility you and the other one, two or fifty people on the road are having the same experience with the same biochemical and emotional responses.
That's what healing is like. You and a significant number of other folks, including me, are dealing with food sensitivities. Doesn't mean you understand their journey or they understand yours. You can discuss the fact that you are on the same road and you see many of the signs, but to expect anyone to truly understand where you are on YOUR journey, is unreasonable.
And to tell someone else "I understand" can feel belittling - like you're minimizing what the other person is experiencing because you've already done it. Instead, consider something like "I can only imagine what you're going through" or "I hear you" or "I can listen if you need to talk about it".
That's why it is SO IMPORTANT for you to have a safe place to comfortably share whatever amount of your unique story you need. Acknowledging the role of your story in your journey is part of healing.
Keep in mind there are a few different approaches here - a formal relationship with a licensed therapist or social worker and then working with a certified coach. The therapist will help you consider and deal with the past stuff. A coach is only looking forward and helping you find your strengths discovered through past events so you can apply them to the future…but not trying to go back and dig it all up.
Each one of us needs to decide the best route for ourselves at any given moment. There is no right or wrong. There is just taking care of you! (Also known as self-care!)
Sixty-second Self-care Tip…
In any healing journey, we need to be able to simply be still. Think of it as a rest stop on the interstate - it's a chance to stop moving and simply pay attention to yourself instead of constantly monitoring the world around you. Stillness engages all aspects of your autonomic nervous system, and when we have a chronic illness or stressor our autonomics can become increasingly unbalanced.
We each have a different capacity at any given moment for sitting still. Listen to your body and only do what is comfortably tolerated.
What are you doing? Experiment with some of these stillness techniques (because not everyone can meditate!):
- Sit in silence with someone.
- Walk with a friend (or pet!) without talking.
- Turn off electronic devices and observe the world around you.
- Stand still in the shower and notice the sound of the water.
- Sit in a favorite spot and silently people watch.
- Explore what works for you for just simply being still…
Please know if you are on this food sensitivity road, I see you. My goal is to warn you about potential road closures or downed trees, or to show you some of the short-cuts to get you to your goal faster. Is there something that is really stressing you right now about food sensitivities? Send me an email and share some of your story. My eyes only at melissa@melissaoverman.com. And know Food Sensitivity Code is coming soon...